“What scares you? Like, top five fears of all time.”
“You want the truth?”
“Always.”
“Whales, getting hit by a foul ball, alien abduction, zombies, and being unwillingly lobotomized.”
“Are you serious?”
“Always.”
“Whales?”
“They are huge! One could swallow you whole and not even notice it.”
“Why would a whale eat you?”
“I am not saying a whale would eat you on purpose, but think about it. Say you are out on a sea kayak watching humbacks migrate and you happen to fall overboard and before you get back into your kayak you get slurped down by a seventy-five foot long aquatic mammal coming up for air.”
“Umm, right, I guess that is pretty scary.”
“Damn right.”
“Ok, I understand the foul ball business, and I really don’t want to spend another hour talking about zombies and alien abductions, but lobotomy? Those aren’t even done anymore!”
“Yeah, but it’s still terrifying! Can you imagine being straped to a table, unable to move, while some sadistic piece of shit takes and ice pick and smashes it through your tear duct with a ballpeen hammer? And after that you’re fucking Rosemary Kennedy for the rest of your life. Tell me that doesn’t scare the piss out of you.”
“Alright R.P. McMurphy, tell you what, if you ever get lobotomized I will make sure to suffocate you with a pillow, Chief Broom style.”
“Thanks, I feel so much better now.”
7.07.2008
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2 comments:
I've found you I think.
it was hard, but doable.
thanks for the thrill of the hunt.
and I like the 'internal dialogue'.
I thought swimming with sharks and drowning were in the top five. YOu think about this WAY too often!
Found you...
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