Parenthetical

I (the narrator, who (in this case) happens also to be (as far as you (the reader (I realize that is (very) presumptuous of me; (I used to think (though my stance has changed (somewhat) recently) semicolons were a fun (or at least esoteric (a fantastic word that I probably (incorrectly) use) enough to merit praise from the (grammatically) uneducated) form of punctuation) perhaps the story was read to you aloud) of this text) can tell) the author) ate a sandwich (tuna fish (a pretty (and majestic) animal (whose majesty (not to be confused with Her (referring to the Queen of England, though you could easily (and probably should) substitute any number of female persons (might I recommend the mighty (and tuneful) Bette Midler?) for all I care) Majesty) instills guilt deep in my heart (not literally in my heart (and not literally guilt, either. More like (vague) remorse). The heart here is a metaphor (how poetic, the heart being a metaphor...) for uhh, whatever part of your being (concise description is beyond me, as you can tell) feels guilt) every time I consume its meat), all reflective electric blue scales), for those that care) today.


Just a little experiment. I was trying to make it much longer, but got so completely bogged down I couldn't go on. It was surprising how difficult it was keeping track of the parenthesis. Another goal was to actually tell a story within the parenthesis, to introduce some sort of developing narrative that would make the whole thing worthwhile. I failed, but am interested to try again. Bonus points if you can figure out what the original sentence is.